My visit to get screened for cancer:
Nurse:
"Sorry your boyfriend couldn't wait for you in the waiting room, it makes women feel uncomfortable."
Me:
"He wasn't my boyfriend and I don't see how it would make them uncomfortable, but that's my opinion. He was here for moral support. I understood, and so does he."
Nurse:
"So he's your...."
Me:
"Friend."
Nurse:
(During the question asking) "How many sexual partners have you had?"
Me:
"11."
Nurse:
"How old were you when you first became sexually active?"
Me:
"....Loaded question but....14, I guess."
Nurse:
"You're sexually active, then."
Me:
"Well....I guess...but..."
Nurse:
"How many times have you been pregnant?"
Me:
"Uh. 0."
Nurse:
"O...kayy...-Checks 'condoms' as my preferred use of birth control-"
Me:
"I don't use condoms. Or take birth control."
Nurse:
"Then how do you avoid getting pregnant?"
Me:
"With homosexuality."
Nurse:
Me:
Nurse:
Me:
"I fuck girls."
